Thinking Update

I can do anything! However, I forget that constantly. I know that being free from compulsive eating today lets me live my life. But, I'm still learning what living life means. I'm taking an intro to abstract math class right now. I have a take home test due at 1pm today. I have known about this test for five days, but I refused to look at it. I don't want to be baffled by the questions and feel stupid. So, I just live in fear of taking the test. When I finally sit down Sunday night and do the fucking thing, it only took me about 90 minutes. It was challenging, I enjoyed that. Why did I not do it sooner? Next time I will do it sooner. I will not let my fears get in the way of my re-covery. My life depends on me. After I finished that test I went downstairs and celebrated with another pudding cup for the day and a Fiber One Bar. Now this is far from a binge, but I must find ways of rewarding myself that do not involve food. Today I see progress not perfection, and that's all I can ask for.