The Life & Recovery of Paul Jackson

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

I feel uncomfortable and I don't know why. Is this what sobriety is supposed to feel like? I commit to no food until my next meal.

1 comment:

Light Language said...: "We should not feel embarrassed by our difficulties, only by our failure to grow anything beautiful from them." ~Alain De Botton

From the Book "The Three Marriages" by David Whyte (He writes of our 3 marriages as partner, work, and self.); April 22, 2009 at 8:17 PM

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Clarity

I never understood football players in the big game praying. Praying for something specific to happen always seemed a bit unpure to me. I used to pray for the ability to wake up the next morning. However, I'd never put any effort into dismantling my fears of obesity, chest pains, and my impending death. I wound rather lay and pray to a God I wasn't all faithful in rather than get myself active in the spirit. Clarity is what I found in OA. The mental clarity I needed to change myself. For over twenty years I let food get in the way of what I needed to see, hear, feel, and live. The world no longer seems so daunting to me. I can now look forward to the struggles of life as learning experiences. Realizing now that facing my life won't kill me.