The Life & Recovery of Paul Jackson: Daily Report for Yesterday & Today

Monday, June 2, 2008

Daily Report for Yesterday & Today

Sat - 5/31
b-snickers bar
l-2 plates of bbq & 2 slices of cake
d-2 plates of bbq
red light day
e-none

Sun - 6/1
b-bowl of cereal pb&j
l-biscuit sandwich, hashbrowns and 11 french toast sticks
d-6 slices of pizza
red light day
e-none

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Clarity

I never understood football players in the big game praying. Praying for something specific to happen always seemed a bit unpure to me. I used to pray for the ability to wake up the next morning. However, I'd never put any effort into dismantling my fears of obesity, chest pains, and my impending death. I wound rather lay and pray to a God I wasn't all faithful in rather than get myself active in the spirit. Clarity is what I found in OA. The mental clarity I needed to change myself. For over twenty years I let food get in the way of what I needed to see, hear, feel, and live. The world no longer seems so daunting to me. I can now look forward to the struggles of life as learning experiences. Realizing now that facing my life won't kill me.